Saturday, November 28, 2009

My Mother Was Right

When I was 17 I told my mother that I wanted to get my ears pierced. This was 1971 and hardly anybody had pierced ears. Maybe gypsies and hookers, not that I knew what a hooker was. I was seriously innocent. I mean, we were barely out of the 60's. Leave It To Beaver, and all that.

I just somehow had the idea that getting my ears pierced would be a very cool and unique thing to do. Maybe Ali McGraw had her ears pierced in Love Story. I thought Ali McGraw was the coolest. My mother, who was of the belief that girls should wear white gloves and keep their legs crossed at all times, thought I had lost my mind. She said, "What?!?! Are you crazy?!?! You are NOT getting your ears pierced, young lady! That is NOT happening. Over my dead body!"

Then she immediately searched for and found some back issues of National Geographic that showed African tribespeople with large heavy objects attached to their VERY long hanging ear lobes, plus giant plates in their lips and metal rings stretching their super long necks. She said, "There! Is that what you want? To look like a savage? Why not just put some big plates in your lips? That certainly looks attractive!"

I was protesting my heart out, making my case for the cool factor, but she went on . . . "What are you thinking? You have a perfectly nice pure sweet body that you were born with. Why would you want to mar it, to ruin it with holes in your ears? What's next, a hole in your nose with a stick through it? Tattoos like a sailor?" Remember, at this time, NOBODY had tattoos except sailors and hoodlums.

She said, "Once you put holes in your ears, you can't undo that damage."

Well, I was rolling my eyes to the max. To my teenage mind my mother was being WAY unreasonable and ridiculous. She was so UNCOOL. But there was no way I was winning this battle and in my house, my mother's rules were the LAW.

So I waited until I was in college later that year and I "secretly" went to the student health center and got my ears pierced by a doctor, knowing I would be in Big Trouble if my mother found out.

Eventually, she did find out and somehow we all lived through it. Ha!

So for 35+ years I enjoyed my pierced ears and I wore earrings EVERY DAY without fail. I would have felt undressed, unpolished, and even embarrassed to be without my earrings. (And without makeup but that's another story, coming soon.) I had fun seeking out the coolest, hippest earrings I could find, loving arts festivals in particular for all the young, hip artists with the newest, most unusual earrings.

Yes, I went on hanging objects from my ear lobes and thinking it was all good, until I started on the fruitarian path. Then, everything started changing for me, and continues to change, all for the BETTER! After about a year on just fruit (about 2 years ago) I literally woke up one morning, began my usual routine (showering, fixing hair, getting dressed) and discovered, like a lightning bolt, that my ears did not want me to put a piece of metal through them and hang something from them. I was so surprised to "hear" from my ears! Even more, I was amazed and shocked to know that every single morning for over 35 years, they were trying to tell me NOT TO DO THAT, PLEASE, OUCH IT HURTS, OH NO, NOT AGAIN but I was unaware and unfeeling of their pain. Numb and dumb and blind to the pain. Wowsers. Can you imagine.

So in an instant I knew that my days of wearing earrings were over and I have not worn them since. My ears are now blissfully natural and free like a child's and we all feel lighter and freer for it. It's just one less thing to do, to pay money for, to be concerned about, to try to be "stylish" and fit in over. I think it is much cooler to be FREE, to think for yourself, to have a natural beauty. I think the new "style" is less stuff, more purity and naturalness.

It is in this way of "waking up" that many things have fallen away, and there are more to come, I am grateful and hopeful to say.

I now have the wish and intention of having the sweet, pure, naturally beautiful body I was born with, as much as possible. I have to admit that now when I see people wearing big dangling earrings, I think they look like Christmas Trees with ornaments hanging from their branches! Ha, ha. I can say this 'cause I used to do it, too.

Also, I really do not understand the whole tattoo thing. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings but I'm so grateful I never went that way. It is harmful to the body, no doubt about it. And permanent. It is just part of the way we are all encouraged to harm ourselves, our beautiful bodies, which are an absolute gift to be cared for and loved, just as they are. What abuse and harm our dear bodies go through in a lifetime, what crazy things people have done to themselves and each other through the eons of time. At the top of the list is eating harmful food, actually putting POISON into ourselves. Yes, we are encouraged and even forced to do this. Heaven help us all.

If I am going to emulate someone's style now, it is going to be that of a clean, pure, and innocent child in their natural beauty and sweetness.

So here is a picture of my now natural left ear. You can see that there is still an indentation from the piercing and I am watching with interest to see if my ears will eventually, over time, fully heal and restore themselves. That would be a fascinating miracle. There is still more healing and transformation to come, thankfully. More miracles. Real healing takes time.

And I really want to give my mother props for being so wise and for being RIGHT. Mothers love to be right, even if it takes almost 40 years to be affirmed. And bless her heart, she died 30 years ago of cancer at the age of 50. Love. ♥


  1. <3

    I like to read your stories, Jules!

    haha, it is fun to read your posts

    yeah, whenever my pierced ears would close up I would see it as a hassle. I had them pierced at age 5, and they closed. A decade later I had them repierced, but they would start closing again since I never wore earrings, and I'd try to stick an earring through them again so they would stay open (ouch)... though now I see they were only healing... and I don't intend on repiercing them anymore.

    Parents are so funny. When I wanted to highlight my hair, my dad would say I would be required to shave it off. hahaha their view on preserving natural beauty is admirable though

  2. Hi, Tinah! Thank you for having fun with me. . . and good thing your ears have healed. Yes, our parents want the best for us, I'm sure. ♥

  3. I peirced my ears when I was around eight, but they were constantly infected so I let them heal over. Thanks for your awesome blog! Totaly an inspiration!

  4. Thank you, Alyssa! Yes, apparently that has happened to a lot of people. I guess you're lucky they did heal. I really appreciate your kind words.

  5. So true, but the body is pretty amazing. Also, thank you for posting that article about the marathon runner, totaly inspiering. I read that you teach yoga, do you like that? I am in training to be a ballet teacher, and I see you to do that to!

  6. Yes, Alyssa, I LOVE yoga and dance, acrobatics and gymnastics and all that stuff. I once was a circus performer. Wow, I love to hear you are into ballet, too. ♥