Funny Conversation

I wish I had a dollar for every time I've had this conversation:

Other Person: Hey, you wanna get together for some pizza and beer?

Me: Well, that's not gonna work for me, since I don't eat pizza. Or drink beer.

OP: What?!? You don't eat pizza??? What do you eat?

Me: Fruit, just fruit. I eat fruit.

OP: (long silence) What do you mean you eat fruit? What else do you eat?

Me: I don't eat anything else. I just eat fruit. That's all I eat.

OP: (more silence) I never heard of that. Are you serious? Like what do you eat for dinner?

Me: Well, last night I had some mangoes and tomatoes for dinner.

OP: Ha! Tomatoes aren't a fruit.

Me: Actually, they are.

OP: (processing this new info) Do you eat vegetables?

Me: No, just fruit.

OP: Really.

Me: Yes, I know it's unusual, but I really do live on fruit. It's the correct food for humans.

OP: Do you eat mashed potatoes?

Me: No, just fruit.

OP: What about tofu? Do you eat tofu?

Me: No, no tofu. Just fruit.

OP: Hmm. Do you ever eat cheese?

Me: No, I definitely don't eat cheese.

OP: (determined now) What about peanuts? Thanksgiving dinner? Ice cream? Halloween candy?

Me: No, none of it. I used to eat that stuff, but it did not bring me health and happiness. Now I only eat fruit and I feel amazing.

OP: Wow. I could never do that. You're missin' out.


I have lots of patience because I had the VERY SAME REACTION when I first heard about it myself. What kind of nutty person would want to live on fruit???

: )